Here it is, my very last week of my course. I have classes tomorrow morning and tuesday afternoon. And thats it. I can't wait.
I pretty much finished my essay today, and I hate the fact that I have been talking about practically nothing but my gorram essay all week. I have also pretty much finished my media folio, so thats good. My report due friday still needs a heck of a lot of work. But that will come when the other stuff is done.
Today I didn't really do much. My brother didn't get home until late in the afternoon, and my parents and sister were in and out of the house all day. I think I pretty much sat here at the computer all day again. -Though I did have a few breaks, I made cookies at one point. The easy kind, that you just break apart and bake. They taste decent enough, chocolate is chocolate. :P
I did a lot of work on my essay, its really crappy and I have no idea if its what he wants...but I'll hand it in anyways. I kinda don't care anymore.
My mum and sister spent the day ranting about this house they went and had a look at while on their walk. I remember having rants like that. Thinking we would move into this great house we saw, that would be totally perfect for us, if only we could actually afford it. I have never ever moved in my life. I have lived my whole twenty years(well 19 and 51 weeks) in this same house, in the same street, suburb, city, etc etc. I have always wanted to move and hopefully will move around a bit when I'm older. But I really can't see us moving anytime soon. My dad doesn't want to and really I do love where we live, its just our house that is the problem, its just not what we want. Its a perfectly fine house, and big too, but we just need something new, something different I think. *shrug*
Tonight I sat around, with nothing to do and I was going through the draws in the dining room. I was looking at all the old school photos, looking at how cute I was as a little kid :P. I was also looking at a few of the old stuff that mum had kept from when I was sick. My prescription books and stuff, and I don't know why exactly, but over the last few years I have really been into findin out about what happened to me as a kid. I hardly remember all the treatment, its all a blur and bits of memories pieced together. The parts I do remember are not all pleasant ones and then I get into a whole train of thought about how I didn't get my normal childhood like everyone else and I always end these kinds of things wanting to cry. -I don't know why I am writing about this stuff here....normally I don't talk about that stuff anywhere, but it just seems to be typing itself.
I think the whole, my very last check up at the childrens hospital being next month is getting to me. I will be going there for the last time for my treatment and seeing my doctors for the last time and thats sad. I have known a lot of the people I see there, since I was a very little kid. I have been going to that hospital at least once a year since I was 5 years old and spent a great deal of my primary school years in there....so to never go there again and to go to some new hospital with new doctors that I don't know and don't know me....scares me.
....oddly enough that totally contradicts my whole wanting to move stuff I was talking about just about all that....but it is a little different. But not really. That hospital has been a 2nd home to me for most of my life and to leave that home terrfies me....but I know it will all be fine and dandy....I just have to let it go. I will take my mind off it with other stuff soon and I will feel better.
Tomorrow is another day
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Carls
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